Navigating the Spectrum: My Choice for Autistic Traits to Keep and Change

Many people with autism consider their condition as an integral part of their identity, starting from birth. For me, the idea of a cure for autism seems misplaced. Instead, I would prefer to keep most of the traits associated with my autism, even the seemingly "negative" ones. The aspects like heightened sensitivity to social gatherings and a natural aversion to substances like alcohol and drugs would remain. But why exactly would I make such a choice and what might be the implications?

Autism as an Identity

What differentiates autism from other conditions is its profound impact on how we perceive the world and relate to others. It shapes everything from dietary preferences and clothing choices to the way I engage with everyday activities. My autism has been both a challenge and a source of unique strengths. Over the years, I have grappled with self-acceptance and have only recently found a sense of self-love and purpose.

Chasing a cure for autism would fundamentally change not only my abilities but also my very self. Even if a treatment could take away what I perceive as "negative" traits, I am wary of the potential consequences. How would I view my past self? Would I be more angry and disliking myself, or would I appreciate the person I have become? These uncertainties make me hesitate to embrace a full "cure."

Practical Considerations and Personal Growth

Another factor to consider is the practical implications of such a treatment. I currently manage my ADHD and PTSD alongside autism. The lines between these conditions can be blurry, leading to confusion about their individual impacts. A potential "cure" for autism could address some symptoms but leave others, making it difficult to distinguish their true origins.

I have experienced some improvements through medication for ADHD, but this has not completely eliminated the challenges. Sometimes, I revert to my old patterns, where tasks seem daunting until I actually undertake them. A similar scenario might play out if I were to be "cured" of autism. I might still grapple with my initial reactions and then find that the task is not as hard as I anticipated.

Additionally, communication and social skills are complex processes that develop over time. Even if a treatment helps me read facial expressions and body language more accurately, it might not guarantee immediate proficiency. Just like learning a new language, there is a learning curve.

Embracing Autistic Traits

Given these considerations, I find it more constructive to embrace my autistic traits, rather than seeking a cure. We are constantly evolving, and the traits that seem negative now might be strengths in different contexts. For example, my aversion to loud environments can be a cue to seek solitude, which can be restorative and help me focus.

Instead of a cure, I prefer the idea of treatment that can help me manage my challenges better. A treatment that could take away distracting habits and peer pressure without erasing the unique way I interact with the world could be a worthwhile compromise. It would allow me to concentrate on my work and studies, pursue any job I choose, and maintain my integrity as an individual.

Conclusion

The concept of a "cure" for autism oversimplifies the complexity of the condition. I would keep most of my autistic traits, even the challenging ones, because they are an integral part of who I am. A more balanced approach to managing my conditions can lead to a more fulfilling life. Here’s to continued personal growth and acceptance.

Sweet dreams!